Rethinking Real Connections
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Hello Reader, Lately, I’ve been thinking a lot about business development back in the day—you know, 2009 or so. Back then, networking was the absolute backbone of my business. These days? You'll more often hear me complaining about it. Which is a shame, because I genuinely love building relationships. I love connecting awesome people, making referrals, and learning about the cool work folks are doing. But that is rarely what "networking" feels like anymore. In fact, whenever I get invited to a networking group now—no matter how lovely the host is—my gut instinct is an immediate, automatic "No, thank you." As I was typing yet another polite decline semi-recently, I started dissecting why modern networking triggers such a strong visceral reaction. What I landed on is this: networking has become overwhelmingly transactional. Instead of meeting people with curiosity and genuine interest, most networking spaces—especially online environments like LinkedIn—have devolved into a "what can you do for me" extraction exercise rather than a "how can we support each other" relationship. It’s gotten to the point where people have explicitly told me they’d love to recommend my work, but won't because I don't pay referral fees. (This is absolutely true, by the way, and it's happened more than once!) Call me Old School (please, call me Old School), but I learned from my early mentors that recommendations should be given without conditions or expectations. That’s how you build real trust. That’s how you operate with integrity. I blame a lot of this shift on MLM-style tactics seeping into everyday online business, but it's also a symptom of a broader culture that treats human connection like a lead conversion funnel. What if we just stopped? What if those of us running businesses online decided to approach connection completely differently? (To be clear: I’m not saying you have to scrap your affiliate partnerships—just that we stop treating human relationships like sales pipelines.) I don't claim to have all the answers, but I know when a system is broken. And modern networking is definitely broken. If we want a simple place to start, try this: Reach out to one awesome colleague this week and ask them, "What kind of ideal referrals are you looking for right now?" File their answer away. When you cross paths with the right match, introduce them. No kickbacks, no tracking links, no expectations—just good people helping good people. Imagine the ripple effect if we all did that just once a month. Maybe what we’ve needed all along isn't a bigger network. Maybe we just need real community. Talk soon, Sarah |